13 Common Myths about Dating that are Totally False

 700 views

13 Common Myths about dating that are totally false

13 false dating myths you need to banish from your mind

There is a plethora of myths about love and dating that have been passed down through the centuries between girlfriends and frat boys.

Remember there used to be a rule about waiting three days to call someone after a date? Imagine if everyone lived like that. Most of us would have never been born.

Whether you heard one from your aunt, a rom-com, or society itself, dating myths are usually generalized claims about dating and love that are only accurate to specific people, if any at all.

Dating myths are rules and claims about dating, romance, and love that are completely fabricated. You’d be better off forgetting them – in other to move forward.

Here are 13 hugely false dating myths you need to banish from your mind:

1. Never have sex on the first date

This is a sexist and outdated idea. It says that having sex on the first date means you are easy and not worthy of respect. This is just old-fashioned and wrong. Dating whether casual or serious is about being yourself, and that includes your sexuality, whatever that may be.

2. The internet has ruined dating

Sure, cat-fishing and the Craigslist killer give online dating a bad reputation. As someone who met her boyfriend online, it still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. But, 20% of current couples have met through online dating.

3. You’ll always love your first love

Sure, you’ll always have the memory of your first love just like the memory of your first kiss or your first car or your first plane ride. But, we over-romanticize our first loves, which were puppy love when you look back.

4. When you meet the one you’ll know

I told myself this for a long time because so many people repeated it to me during my single days. They said you’ll just know. And the thing is, I didn’t. Sure, some people have that love at first sight feeling, but that isn’t how it will work for everyone.

5. Marriage is the goal

Not everyone wants or needs to get married, and that is okay. Not everyone needs a monogamous relationship, and that is okay. Marriage is not a measurement of your success.

6. You’ll find the one when you stop looking

How did so many people meet their person online if they weren’t looking? This makes zero sense and is meant to help you relax about being single. There is nothing wrong with trying or looking if that is what you want.

7. Love conquers all

This may be the biggest myth in all of love and dating. Love is strong and amazing. It can do a lot, but it is not everything. If love conquered all, no one would divorce or break up or cheat. Love is not always enough – you can love someone and not trust them. You can love someone and cheat on them. Relationships require a lot more than love to survive.

8. Women like bad boys

In every teen drama, you see the good girl fall for the bad boy. This is the same reason “they” say nice guys finish last. There is this romanticism of the bad boy turning good for the girl. The thing is that it is almost always on TV or in books.

In real life, nice guys don’t finish last. Every single one of my friends ditched their high school or college beaus who claimed to be nice guys for actual nice guys who own up to their mistakes and work at being good people every day.

Women may like a little banter when flirting, but we would almost always choose a respectful man who is open about his feelings than the bad boy.

9. Play hard-to-get

Playing hard-to-get is a mind game. As common as that phrase is, it rarely works. Studies have even shown that a man may be more likely to try to pick up a woman that plays hard to get but will rarely choose her for the long haul.

People who like the chase are usually in competition with themselves and not ready for a relationship. So, if you are serious about dating, playing hard-to-get is not the right move.

10. Women care more

This goes back to women being always the caregiver, the mother, the gentle one. The fact is, it isn’t true. Men and women care equally and messily. Some days a woman may care more, while other days the man might.

And many studies have shown that men handle heartbreak worse than women. Some studies even say it takes men up to twice as long to get over a breakup as women do.

11. Being husband or wife material

If you think of these terms, you probably think of a woman making her husband a martini and roast after a long day at work, and a man providing for his wife and buying her jewelry.

That right there is enough to tell you how outdated this dating myth is. There is no such thing as a husband or wife material, at least not generally.

Maybe husband material for me is a guy who loves animals, supports my career, and is cool with my mom living with us. Whereas for you, it could be a guy who loves to travel, explore new places, and go on adventures.

12. Men want sex more than women do

Women enjoy sex just as much as men do. The only reason this isn’t discussed or well-known is that for centuries women have been made to feel ashamed for their sexuality while also being judged for it.

Women needed to look sexy while feeling ashamed of feeling sexy. Both men and women enjoy sex.

13. Everyone lies and cheats

This is a bitter take on dating and love in general. This comes down to your beliefs about people being inherently good or bad, but it just isn’t true.

Not everyone lies and cheats. Sure, for six years of dating, every guy I went out with lied to me or cheated on me, and it got me down, but holding onto the hope that there were good guys out there led me to my current boyfriend.

LIFE STYLE |

ZAMBIAN FACE